Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Secret to the Airport

I have uncovered the secret to Vancouver International Airport.

I've noticed in past passings-through of this airport that there is absolutely nothing open in international departures after about midnight. Well, nothing that serves alcohol in anything other than a Duty-Free bag, that is.

Oh, I know: poor Benny the drunk can't get any booze until he's on the plane. Cry me a river.

Yeah, yeah. This is actually serious. If I just wanted a drink, not being able to get one wouldn't be that big a deal. This is much more serious a matter than that. We're talking about an airborne sleep strategy that's at stake. I have a scientific program of drinking and not drinking that allows me to cross the pacific and wake up fresh as a daisy and in the proper timezone on the other side. A little thing like not being able to get a drink at midnight while I'm waiting for my flight can screw the whole thing up and bang, I'm up shit creek and jet lagged like all the rest of the poor stiffs on the flight who don't know how to drink strategically.

But I've fixed it. I've finally learned the secret.

I'm sure many of you know the secret, but I've been a religiously cheap traveller for years, so excuse my ignorance of what money can do.

I've learned that for $35, you can get into the China Airways lounge and drink (or not drink) as much as you can (or can not) swallow, at any time of the night. I've learned that if it's late at night, you can get in for $20. And I've learned that if you confuse the nice man at the counter, it gets cheaper than that. And the best thing is, if you only have time for one beer, they'll only charge you for one.


Oh yeah. What am I weblogging for? Erin and I are on the road again. It's super exciting. I'm super excited. I'd convey it better if it wasn't 2AM and I wasn't strategically drinking. We're going to Chiang Mai in northern Thailand to hang out and write a bit. The best part: we brought our bikes! We're going to cycle all around northern Thailand!

More later.

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